So cheesy. AHAHA

while browsing the older posts of mine. i can't help it but to laugh insanely. lawak okay. the writings and the choice of words were so lame and childish. honestly, i don't have the talent to write creatively. that's me and that's okay. at least. i tried. i tried to journal my thoughts, stupid rants and my life events. for what purpose? because 20 years from now, i'll be reading again the older posts and i know i'll be laughing my ass off reading them. it would be like light entertainment for me in the future :D

kau pergi.

3rd death news i received since I've been in New Zealand.

Atuk Leman passed away yesterday. he has gone to meet his Creator.

Inna Lillahi Wa Inna Ilahi Rajioon. May Allah rest his soul in peace.

i wish i could be with my mom right at this moment. i feel sad because i couldn't be there when she needed me the most. her beloved father has passed away. i know mama is terribly devastated by this lost. Atuk Leman has left us and i believe he is in a better place. Allah lebih sayangkan atuk Mama.

Dear Mama,

you'll have to be strong. my thoughts and prayer are always with atuk. Moga roh atuk dicucuri rahmat. Moga Allah tempatkan atuk di kalangan orang beriman. Amin. he's a good person. i will never forget Atuk. i've accepted this news positively. i grieved but i didn't let tears to come out. i held myself from crying and sobbing. because i knew, it wouldn't make a difference whether i cried. Atuk has gone forever. nothing i do in this world will ever bring him back. So friends and whoever reads this post, please pray my atuk. Al-Fatihah for him.

Mama kuat tau. i love you.

Atuk Leman, Pak Ngah Norzan, Nenek. May Allah grant you with Jannah. Al-Fatihah for them. friends, i'd like to request you guys to recite Al-Fatihah for them. thanks.

children killing children?

hello blog,

ok honestly, the title creeps me out. huhu.

last Wednesday, during Epsy 343 lecture, the topic was really2 interesting. about youth and crimes. the topic immediately captured my interest. why? because i'm a huge fan of cops procedural shows. haha. shows like CSIs, Criminals Minds are my thing. in the lecture, my lecturer Chris gave a case that happened in 1993, in Liverpool, England. known as the murder of James Bulger. two 10 years old boys who played truancy that day, abducted baby James 2 years old from his mother at a shopping mall and took him for 2 miles walk, battered him to death and left his mutilated body on the rail track. omg. that is wicked. such a heinous act to be committed by such young boys.

that night, when i was online-ing. i youtubed a bit about the murder of James Bulger. found that the killers were just kids from the neighborhood, with innocent look. i just don't understand. how could a child kills other child? i mean they were too young to commit such act. how could they think about hurting other people? where did they get such immoral idea from? from media? computer games perhaps? should we blame the parents? or the teachers? who didn't notice their disturbing behaviors at first. honestly this case is very disturbing. i couldn't forget the image of happy baby James. that poor baby trusted those boys without knowing that was the last day he lived on this earth. sad. this is so sad. i hate this kind of crime. i just don't understand. WHY?

p/s: please please people. get to know your children well. monitor your children behaviors. keep holding their hands. don't let them go. the important is to love your children. don't drag them into your life problems. it's going to be the worst nightmare ever for parents, to wake up the next day, to know that your child has killed other child. and it's all because of your bad upbringings. this is sad. you don't want that right? so please. learn your children well.

Rugby and Rant.

hello blog,

out of all days in a month, today is the day. Gosh, the pain i have endured this morning, i could not describe through words laa. my stomach is churning, burning and twisting. ouch. T.T

ok let's forget about the stomach part. i slept for 5 hours today. skipped Peter Gu's lecture. had no choice. my stomach hurts so much. i had to lay on my bed. when i woke up, dashed, rushed to the university. had discussion with Kiwi course mates and Mona. felt happy because i have contributed something towards the discussion. they're gonna use my ideas during the seminar presentation. cool aite? *blushing* thanks mates :)

now, feel serabut. July is nearing. that means Winter trip is coming soon. Gonna fly to Dunedin. heard that South Island's scenery is beautiful during winter. at the same time, gonna give our support and cheers for our WMSO athletes during Bersatu Games. Dunedin is the host for this year's Bersatu Games.

okay, why i feel serabut? i'm worrying over the budgets. money money. nak jalan perlukan pulus. sigh. nak menyimpan lagi. nak jalan lagi. letih. BUT. if i don't travel, it would be a waste kan? our gov send us to here for what?? STUDYYYY. err no. TRAVELLING. ahaha. okay. joking :P i wanna be a Billionaire so freaking baaad. buy all of the things i never had . . .

tetiba nyanyi lagu Bruno Mars??

okay then. nuff crapping. i need to do some reading a lil bit then off to sleep. i'm working tomorrow. huh. annoyed with my boss. dia lupa bayar gaji :(

alright, last Friday, went to watch Rugby between Wellington Hurricanes and Auckland Blues. too bad Hurricanes lost. Blue rulez and topping the table. fine. whatever. i still had fun :D

Westpac Stadium. Hoho.

True fan :D

Happy Mama's Day!

Dear Mama,

i'm 100% sure that you won't be reading this. because you don't have a blog and you don't even know the existent of my blog. ahaha. because i didn't tell you :P

ok let's get straight. i wanna wish you Happy Mother's Day Mama <3

Mama,

thanks for bringing me into this world,

thanks for teaching me about life,

thanks for raising me up and Insyaallah I'll become a better person. it's all because of your guidance and prayer.

thanks for putting up with me all this while, after all the craps i have pulled over the years, you still forgive me and stay with me,

you're so forgiving mom, though i was kinda misbehaved to you.

thanks for everything.

i don't know what to say anymore. to list out all your sacrifices and what you have done to me, it could be millions.

Mama,

i'm sorry if i'm not being a good daughter,

i'm sorry if i ever make you cry,

i'm sorry if i ever hurt your feelings,

i'm sorry if i ever not being thankful after what all you did to me,

i'm sorry for not giving you a call so often,

i'm sorry if i have you let you down,

i'm sorry for everything.

I love you bits and pieces Mama.

and i hope you love me too :)

auuwww mama and ayah are such a romantic couple. ayah are you sticking your tongue out? nakal lah ayah nie. ahaha. mama, hugs ketat-ketat, jangan biar ayah lari. hehe. Happy Mama's Day MAMA. love you heaps mama. Always will.