Is there any hope left for me?

      Hello people.. especially people who cares about me and my blog.. actually i'm not in da mood to blog. because i'm so stress and freaking tired!! i don't want to write this, but deep down inside my heart. i wanna share it in this blog. i wanna people to read it, and i wanna people to feel what i feel rite now. all this while, i hadn't realized that my voice would cause lotsa problems to me in the future. i'm having problem to project my voice and one of my lecturers said that my voice was toneless. i embarrassed myself today at the front class, i was so disappointed that i couldn't do the simplest thing. i'm sorry madam..you critic me twice. but still i had no improvement.. once there was this lecturer said to me that she couldn't differentiate whether i was mad or happy when i was talking. hmmm..i guess that's true lah that i'm being toneless.. huhuhu.. i just couldn't understand. why is it so hard for me to project my voice..to make it louder.. i'm having problems each time when i wanna present something at the front class. or is it i was meant to be like this forever. i'm so stress!! why bad things keep happening to me??? my self-esteem nowadays is really low. it makes me feel inferior, scared to be in the public or crowds. i'm beginning to feel that i might give up on this course. i started to think that i might not do well for this course. YA ALLAH, why is it so hard for me to go through this course?? i started to lose hope..hope to continue, hope to move on, hope to be happy with what i'm trying to do.. i'm losing hope.. i'm not sure what's going to happen to me in the next few months.. i'm losing grip rite now. i'm losing guidance.. i'm losing interest and passion for this course.. i dunno what's wrong with me rite now.. i'm so not perfect and my weakness and flaws are affecting my studies and life.. is there any hope for me... hope to make me a better person, a better teacher to-be..a better daughter for my parents, a better friend to the people around me.. is there any hope for me.. i don't see any hope rite now.. i'm crossing my fingers that everything is going to be fine soon. i pray to Allah that all my wishes will termakbul and i could be a person who is berjaya di dunia dan di akhirat.. i pray that i will have a bright future..
 
YA ALLAH..kabulkan lah permintaan hamba mu ini..
jauhkan lah hamba mu ini dari kesusahan dan musibah..
kurniakan lah hamba mu ini kebahagian dan kegembiraan,
dan jauhkan lah hamba mu ini dari kesedihan dan penghinaan,
semoga hidup hamba mu ini berjalan lancar dan mudah kan lah urusan ku..YA ALLAH..
AMIN..

hamba mu yang lemah,
QisTiNa..